Fuck Santa (Part I)

Fuck Santa,
I'm gonna be naughty
No need to know if I've been good
Cause it's all going to be bad. 
In my defence, you've stopped bringing me presents anyway!
So I'm not gonna cry but I will pout and this is why...

Of Books & Their Covers

Judge me
It's my book, I covered it
Perceive your reality
Make it my truth
Aid the depravity of this truth
Abet this truth through judgement
Judge me
And use it to cover me
Judge & jury Reading out my sentences
I am but a book to be read
And my book has blown your cover
Judge me, I'm covered.
You're Honourd, be my judge.  

Quickly, before you know what's happening

I fall in love, 
Quickly and often
Giving it no chance to manifest
It stays as love
I wish I would fall out of love
As quick and as often
Yet, I sit there, on the chamber
Oblivious to the smell accumulating
And so I become 
Depleted,Dissipated, spent
It's conception worse than it's birth
And yet still I love
Quicker yet less often
And just as I am, I love
Without adjective  

Lime Green Suitcases

I packed a bag yesterday
mainly clothes and other such facades
exteriors that I have now confined to the interior
of my lime green suitcases.
A suitcase who's outward appearance is bright enough to
mask the squashed wrinkled chaos within

I really didnt think I had that much
and I'm not entirely sure i need it all
but nonetheless it is packed, ever so neatly,
in my limegreen suitcase - Filled full to the brim

I'm going to send the bag ahead
and I hope they receive it as a spokesperson
heralding my pending arrival
rather than a warning shot which can only be followed by
chaos and mahem.

I have two more suitcases to pack, they're also Lime green
I dont have the same things to put them
but I will still fill them full
with more imprtant stuff
stuff that I can not send ahead
Stuff that must remain with me
me

I'm a lime green suitcase
filled full to the brim
packed ever so neatly
with clean wrinkled clothes
just waiting to be aired

Stumble and Stand

Before you fall you stumble.
Your body does everything possible
to try and keep you in an upright position
Or at least minimise the impact of your fall.

And this is what my body did/does
for the first couple of weeks of my nutritional plan [read Diet].
It kept stumbling, not knowing that I wanted to fall.
Self preservation I guess, even if it was preservation of my current
unsummer worthy body.
Alarm bells start going off, mini stumbles, that involve a dry mouth, loud uncontrolable stomach growls, well thought out excuses, bad breadth, mood swings, hunger pains in my heart....


This made me wonder, what else my Physical and Metaphysical,
In a self destructive separation,do in the name of such preservations?

Is my inner being working with me or against me in what it thinks is right
for me? What is right for me?

What am I subconsciously not doing?
What options am I not taking?
What life am I not living?

Are the words coming out of my mouth the same as those that I'm thinking?
Are my principles abundantly apparant in my actions?
What/Who is my character?

Or am I stumbling? Trying not to fall even though I really should not be standing like this?

Actions need not be explained. They, should be explanations within themselves.

I must fall into a higher standing

The fat Boy and I

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